This website and its operator, Banana Republicards, LLC, are not affiliated in any way with the retail brand Banana Republic, or its parent company, Gap Inc.

Googles Has Gone Ga-Ga

It's been 10 days since Google first rejected the B.R. Cards ad campaign, and they're still at it. Up and at it early this morning, I read their latest rejection letter, which was exactly like their first. My ad had been disapproved for Election Advertising in the United States. They want a certificate which states Banana Republicards, LLC paid for this ad advertising the cards made by Banana Republicards, LLC, or some kind of shit like that. I spent 3 awful months being one of the few Jews working at Facebook, so I know what kind of ignorance sits in a bubble of a billion dollar information technology company. The email I received was more like a form and came from a no-reply address. I'm pretty certain the individual behind the decision for that particular message was hired by a contracting firm who trained that person to follow a decision tree, and to do so as quickly as possible. When I was at Facebook, that meant I was told to cut my 45-second decision time to 30-seconds. And then they [...]

By |2020-11-29T00:21:18-08:00November 3rd, 2020|Of Googles and Damnation, Uncategorized|

Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday

Quite frankly, it never should have come to this. Robert Mueller had his chance to save this country, and he failed. It was not his place to break precedence, he said, even though the subject of the investigation, the President of the United States, was constantly breaking all the precedents. Ultimately, he warned, it is up to Congress to enact; and enact upon it the Dem controlled House did. But the Republicans in the Senate couldn't have cared less. They repeated so many worries: on one hand, transparency; on the other, precedence. How dare the House not conduct a thorough investigation even though the White House refused to comply with any and all requests for documents. How dare the House subpoena White House staff who all possess privilege information because all their information comes from the Big Kahuna himself, Dearest Leader. Hence our cards. Joe Biden was never my top choice. I guess I agree with 30% of his agenda, but that is monumental compared to the current president. I also like Kamala Harris as a representative of my generation. [...]

By |2020-12-01T22:03:34-08:00November 1st, 2020|Future Boredroom Archives, Uncategorized|

These Thoughts Are Here For a Reason

I am pretty certain that Webmaster Mike is not too down on my previous post, but that's why it's tucked back here on the company blog, where I, Sole Member, speak only for myself. Frank is definitely not down with the potential of MAGA men seeking comeuppance for Dear Leader, so everybody leave him out of it. And Danielle is too sweet and innocent. She is also conniving and can cut ya, Proud Boy. She was my supervisor at the head shop for almost 100 days. I know of what I speak. Webmaster Mike is as even-keeled as they get. It is one reason why he's loved and cherished by so many. As of this morning, he was still talking to Google; and I'm totally sure they know how to find their way back here to the company blog where they might read my angry thoughts about them, but if they won't let us advertise, then I get to say what I want back here. And that happens to be, Fuck 'em! I know my money isn't special to a [...]

By |2020-12-01T22:04:22-08:00October 30th, 2020|Future Boredroom Archives, Uncategorized|

Google Ads Hates Us

To go along with our Mother Jones mobile device ad, we've been trying to get a Google Ads account up and running so that folks who visit left-wing blog sites can stumble across our wares. Unfortunately for us, B.R. Cards appears to have scared the trillion dollar Alphabet Corp. According to Webmaster Mike, the only time he has had this much difficulty was when working on a CBD site. Google Ads is concerned about the current B.R. Cards ad campaign in three (3) ways:1. Politicization. Google doesn't allow political ads unless there is a disclaimer on the bottom indicating where the money for the ad came from. Which seems silly because we are selling playing cards, and the money for the ad comes from the company (mine) selling the cards; i.e. the name of the money behind the ad is in the actual ad.2. Online Gambling. The Googlers seem to think our ad might go so far as encourage some of you folks to gamble your lives away. As opposed to the politicians we are mocking who have pretty much [...]

By |2020-11-29T00:22:02-08:00October 30th, 2020|Of Googles and Damnation, Uncategorized|

Time Is About to Change

Our nation's clocks fall back an hour this coming Sunday. As an early riser, that means I now spend up to two hours of pitch black when I wake up in the morning. This works for me as a daily metaphor of where we are as a country. Two days ago, I woke up to the news of Amy Coney Barrett's sworn in as the newest judge on the U.S. Supreme Court. Another Catholic, and this one has only three years of actual bench experience. If only finding work was this easy for a Jewish pothead such as myself. In fact, not finding a job is the sole reason why I began Banana Republicards, LLC. No one was going to pay me to work for them, so I might as well work for myself and hope it pays off. The numbers say it's possible. I want to sell 25,000 packs of Gold Back cards, which amounts to .8% of the 3 million more people who voted for Hillary Clinton over Donald Trump, and a mere .03% of Hillary's actual vote [...]

By |2020-12-01T22:05:57-08:00October 29th, 2020|Future Boredroom Archives, Uncategorized|

This Is the Company Blog

This is where I, Sole Member, will write to all who wish to waste more time here and read in 1st person singular. This is opposed to the front page of the site where I, as sole member of Banana Republicards, LLC, strive to maintain a sales approach of 3rd person company voice that casually falls into a 1st person plural. And though it may be in this country, that a corporation is a person, too, my friend, my company happens to be a sole membership LLC, and so there's a whole other voice there than there is over here. You can trust me on that. This isn't my first blog, but it is my first blog with a purpose other than trying to get some writing done. For the company blog will be focused on matters that involve company thoughts. All the ins and outs that B.R. Cards can muster and put on a screen for you, the reader, to waste even more time at this site. That's really what this blog is about: customer retention. Maybe, the thought [...]

By |2020-11-29T00:22:24-08:00October 29th, 2020|Je Suis Company Blog, Uncategorized|
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